Peter Young and the Column of Words

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This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 8th March 2011.

A throwaway line during a movie review in the UK has inspired the production of a low budget film in Australia. During a review of Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief on BBC Radio Five Live last year, respected film reviewer Mark Kermode made fun of the film, criticising it as a knock-off of the Harry Potter franchise. It was so derivative that, according to Kermode, it may as well have been called “Benjamin Sniddlegrass and the Cauldron of Penguins.”

Kermode, along with radio host Simon Mayo, command a loyal and sizeable UK audience via their two hour movie review and interview show every Friday, which is also available to the rest of the world via podcast. Naturally, this witty title took the imagination of listeners everywhere and following many texts and emails to the show, a few fan produced posters for the proposed film appeared online.

Late last year, Australian writer and director Jeremy Dylan announced that he would be putting his own money on the line to actually produce the film and in January, the world premiere of the low budget satire Benjamin Sniddlegrass and the Cauldron of Penguins was held at the Dendy cinema in Newtown.

Starring Andrew Griscti as the title character, the film follows the adventures of Benjamin, “a nerdy, skiffle-loving redhead from Cockfosters” who finds out that he is a wizard and is soon whisked off to an island in Australia to be trained in magic by mentor Pentangle and Bavarian filmmaker Werner Herzog. Sound familiar?

Whilst the film is a broad satire of the Harry Potter franchise and the Percy Jackson not-quite-successful-enough-to-be-a-franchise movie, it is also packed with in-jokes from the radio show. Sniddlegrass loves skiffle because Mark Kermode plays bass in the skiffle / rockabilly quartet The Dodge Brothers. The character of Werner Herzog is based on the real eccentric German filmmaker of the same name (Rescue Dawn, Fitzcarraldo, Nosferatu the Vampyre) who famously was shot by an unknown assailant with an air rifle during an interview with Kermode, brushing it off and continuing the interview with the comment, “it was not a significant bullet.”

Of course, the low budget nature of the film means that the cast is composed of unknown actors, with the exception of famous actor, writer and comedian Stephen Fry (Gosford Park, Alice in Wonderland, V for Vendetta) who somehow was convinced by the director to narrate the story.

Benjamin Sniddlegrass and the Cauldron of Penguins is currently available via digital download for the reasonable price of $10. It will also soon be out on DVD. Other screenings worldwide are being demanded by supporters and fans.

The film itself is worth a chuckle or two. Despite being restricted by its tiny budget, it is hard not to smile throughout the seventy minute running time. I would definitely recommend that you familiarise yourself with the banter of Kermode and Mayo’s radio show before you see the movie. There are plenty of hilarious clips of Kermode’s famous rants online.

Published in: on March 15, 2011 at 07:03  Leave a Comment  
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Post-Oscar career slumps: it could happen to you

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This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 25th January 2011.

The Oscars are almost upon us. On February 27 at the Kodak Theatre in Los Angeles, the stars will come together for Hollywood’s night of nights. The nominees are yet to be announced, although I’m pretty sure that Natalie Portman and Colin Firth already have their speeches ready. Whilst I’m certain that every actor would love to be called to the podium to receive an Oscar, there isn’t any guarantee that a career will continue to soar after winning arguably the world’s most famous paper weight.

Christoph Waltz burst onto the Hollywood scene in last year’s Inglourious Basterds, winning the Oscar for Best Actor. Although not an overnight success (he has been working in theatre, television and non-Hollywood films for over thirty years), his depiction of the cruel and ruthless Colonel Hans Landa in Quentin Tarantino’s masterpiece made audiences take notice. Many cinefiles such as myself couldn’t wait to see what this obviously very talented Austrian would do next.

Disappointingly, he followed up his Oscar winning performance as a villain with a role playing practically the same villain in The Green Hornet which hit screens last week. I’m sorry, but being in 3D doesn’t give a performance extra depth. Coming up next for Waltz is an adaption of The Three Musketeers. I just hope he’s not playing a cruel and ruthless villain.

Cuba Gooding, Jr followed a remarkable turn in Boyz n the Hood (1991) with a Best Supporting Actor Oscar for Jerry Maguire in 1996. His critically acclaimed performance as footballer Rod Tidwell spawned the catchphrase, “Show me the money.” Unfortunately for Gooding, his Oscar win was for acting, not role selection, and it has been downhill ever since.

How do you follow-up the role of a lifetime? Why not take on the challenging Shakespearian drama of Boat Trip (2002), Norbit and Daddy Day Camp (both 2007)? Gooding’s acting work has been the exclusive domain of direct to TV movies for the past two years. I guess we all have to eat.

After a string of erotic thrillers and action films in the eighties and early nineties, Kim Basinger took out the 1997 Best Supporting Actress Oscar for L.A. Confidential. As femme fetale Lynn Bracken, she was perfectly cast as the Veronica Lake look-alike prostitute. With the exception of a few major releases such as Cellular (2004) and The Sentinel (2006), Basinger has been working on small independent pictures and television since. She also has had the dubious honour of portraying Eminem and Zac Efron’s mother in 8 Mile (2002) and Charlie St Cloud (2010), respectively.

Who can forget Roberto Benigni’s over the top reaction to winning the Best Actor Oscar in 1999 for Life is Beautiful? I think almost everyone would like to forget it. The excitable Benigni climbed over the seats and applauded the audience before making his way to the podium to make a giddy speech. Unfortunately since then, he has directed and starred in Pinocchio (2002), which bombed at the box office, as well as taking roles in epic historical dramas such as Asterix and Obelix vs Caesar (1999).

Unless you’re receiving a lifetime achievement honour at the Academy Awards, the assumption is that the best is yet to come. In the ever changing world of Hollywood, that is not always true despite talent and luck. Still, a win is a win and being an Oscar recipient ensures your name will be in the record books forever. Hollywood history shows that in time, only the good films are remembered. Did I mention that Orson Welles’ final performance was in Transformers: The Movie (1986)?

Published in: on January 25, 2011 at 06:32  Leave a Comment  
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Product placement in movies: buy a hot dog

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This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 18th January 2011.

Remember that scene in Casino Royale, the 2006 James Bond reboot, where 007 and Vesper Lynd are travelling on a train and she asks him about his watch? She asks, “Rolex?” Bond (Daniel Craig) calmly replies, “Omega.” Lynd ends the conversation about the watch with the simple, “Beautiful.”

Ker-ching! You’ve just been the victim of product placement. Omega reportedly paid $7 million per film for Bond to spruik Omega watches. Sure, the world’s favourite superspy has to wear a watch so it may as well be an actual brand but there’s really no need to shove it down our throats by altering the script to become a bizarre commercial. Last time I checked, the ads were meant to be before the film, not during the feature.

Product placement in films is nothing new but imagine what might happen if a company actually bankrolls a feature film. There are two famous examples of this. One is a beloved family film and the other is one of the worst movies ever made (it has a 0% positive rating on Rotten Tomatoes).

Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was originally published in 1964. A children’s literary classic, it was adapted into a movie musical starring Gene Wilder in 1971. What you may not know is that the film was financed by the Quaker Oats Company.

Founded in 1901, the company specialised in breakfast cereals at the time and had no experience in film making. The film’s producer, David L. Wolper, managed to convince the company that the movie would be the perfect advertising medium for their new candy bars. And thus, the Wonka Bar was born and the film’s title was altered to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory in anticipation of a marketing match made in heaven.

Unfortunately, due to production problems, Wonka Bars never made it to the shops and the film was released, unblemished by product placement, to generally positive reviews (Dahl hated it) but mediocre box office. Via endless television repeats and its popularity on video and DVD, it is now considered an iconic children’s film (despite the scene showing a chook being decapitated).

Quaker Oats sold their share of the rights for half a million dollars 1977 and never invested in another film again.

Mac and Me was an E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial rip-off released in 1988. Featuring a cute alien (MAC stood for “Mysterious Alien Creature”) who befriends a boy in a wheelchair whilst on the run from evil government scientists and agents, this turkey was financially backed by Coke and McDonalds.

In one of the least subtle product placement ever, Mac (as in Big Mac) conveniently only needs Coke and Skittles to survive. A visit to a McDonalds Restaurant with the bad guys hot on the trail strangely deteriorates into a syrupy happy impromptu dance contest, complete with a cameo from Ronald McDonald. This sickly sweet scene is widely available on YouTube and has to be seen to be believed. A warning, you may need insulin afterwards.

Ronald McDonald deservedly won the Worst New Star category at the 1988 Golden Raspberry Awards for Mac and Me. The film ends with the words, “We’ll Be Back!” written across the screen. Luckily for us, this atrocious waste of celluloid didn’t spawn a sequel. I understand that business for McDonalds was unaffected by the film’s failure and that there are now several restaurants worldwide.

So the next time you buy a watch, or grab a drink, or participate in an impromptu dance off at your local burger joint, or visit a chocolate factory run by little men with green hair, ask yourself if Hollywood made you do it.

Published in: on January 23, 2011 at 10:09  Leave a Comment  
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Film Review: The King’s Speech

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 28th December 2010.

According to reports, the most “Oscar worthy” film of the Boxing Day releases is The King’s Speech. Focusing on King George VI’s struggles with a stutter and his interactions with Australian speech therapist, Lionel Logue, the performances of lead actors Colin Firth and Geoffrey Rush are already being touted for Oscar nominations. In order to properly review the film, I thought it was important to appraise The King’s Speech from a cinematic and therapeutic perspective so I enlisted Sydney speech therapist Lyndal Sheepway to join me for an expensive but comfortable Gold Class Boxing Day screening.

The Story

Peter says: The triumph over adversity storyline is nothing new, although this is a little known true story. Apparently when approached by the filmmakers, The Queen Mother gave permission for the dramatisation but only after she was dead, so traumatic was the actual event. To me, the stakes were simply not high enough. A rich, powerful monarch with a speech impediment is not quite My Left Foot or Rain Man is it?

Lyndal says: I was reasonably unfamiliar with the storyline before seeing the movie but thought that anything involving a speech therapist was surely going to be interesting! Unfortunately it didn’t really pack a punch for me. Like Peter, I didn’t think the stakes were high enough, and the final triumph wasn’t all that triumphant.

The Performances

Peter says: The disability card has certainly worked well Oscar-wise for Dustin Hoffman (Rain Man), Daniel Day-Lewis (My Left Foot), Tom Hanks (Forrest Gump) and Geoffrey Rush (Shine) but a stutter is completely treatable. If Mr Darcy deserves an Oscar, it should be for his sublime performance in last year’s A Simple Man. Aussie Geoffrey Rush plays, well, an Aussie Geoffrey Rush. After stints at Hogwarts and Wonderland, Helena Bonham Carter returns to her strengths, playing a stoic English upper class lady. Guy Pearce is surprising effective in the small but important role of King Edward VIII who abdicates the throne for American socialite Wallis Simpson.

Lyndal says: I really wasn’t convinced by Colin Firth’s stutter. A little boy who plays one of Geoffrey Rush’s clients does a more convincing job. Geoffrey Rush plays the same character he often does, but called this one a speech therapist. Helena Bonham Carter definitely shows her versatility playing the wife of a king, while in the cinema next door she’s a Death Eater fighting Harry Potter. The best Australian accent in the film comes from an artificially aged Jennifer Ehle (Elizabeth Bennett to Colin Firth’s Mr Darcy) who plays Geoffrey Rush’s wife. Also great to see Guy Pearce back on the screen, even if only for a short time.

The Speech Therapy

Peter says: I’m not a speech therapist but I’m pretty sure jumping up and down whilst humming and rolling around on the floor are not part of today’s speech therapy techniques. The King’s Speech and Drama Coach is more like it.

Lyndal says: Peter’s right. Some of the techniques used in the film are rather dubious. We now know for sure that stuttering is not caused by anxiety or childhood experiences. Therapy during the days of King George VI was based on this incorrect assumption. The techniques are essentially ineffective – The King’s stuttering doesn’t improve all that much, and he insists that his therapist should be with him all the time. These days we help people so that they don’t need us around all the time. Speech therapy has definitely come a long way since World War II. And most of us are more attractive that Geoffrey Rush!

Overall

Peter says: I’m sure Mrs Rush would disagree with you. This film is all a little too low key for me. Just like The Queen, this would make a riveting TV movie, but besides the scenes in Ely Cathedral (standing in for Westminster Abbey), the picture is simply not cinematic enough to deserve the big screen. This film is definitely not in the same league as The Hurt Locker or even Slumdog Millionaire. I’m sure it will be nominated as Best Picture but it shouldn’t win. That honour should be reserved for Yogi Bear 3D.

Lyndal says: Can I review Yogi Bear with you too, Peter? Seeing The King’s Speech was a good way to spend an afternoon, but it would be just as enjoyable on DVD. For me, it lacked a hook. The improvement in the stuttering wasn’t strong enough, the bond between the king and his speech therapist wasn’t strong or convincing enough, and the country’s fear about the impending war wasn’t communicated through the film at all. It doesn’t get my vote for an Oscar.

Peter says: So you have voting rights? Go Yogi. Thanks for joining me. Ha-ha-happy new year!

Lyndal says: Thank you for the Gold Class experience! And the sundae!

Published in: on December 27, 2010 at 23:27  Comments (1)  
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A Year In Film 2010

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 14th December 2010.

With the end of the year looming and it becoming very clear that my crazy Christmas schedule will not allow me to see the inside of a cinema before Boxing Day, here are my top five films of 2010. I haven’t frequented the flicks as regularly during this past twelve months compared to previous years so I have also listed what I think will be the critics’ top five picks, the majority of which I haven’t seen, but hope to, eventually.

My top five

5. Daybreakers – Directed by the talented brothers Peter and Michael Spierig from Brisbane, this clever Australian flick turns the vampire mythology upside down by creating a world populated by the undead with humans being the endangered food source. Featuring international stars Willem Dafoe and Ethan Hawke, with local actors Sam Neill and Claudia Karvan, this is a vamptastic sci-fi horror. The feature length making of documentary included on the blu-ray is fascinating.

4. Piranha 3D – Forget your lush alien planets and their blue skinned residents, this is exactly what 3D cinema should be about. It was crass, bloody and deliberately badly acted, and I loved it. A hoard of hungry, primeval flesh eating fish get unleashed upon a lake full of nubile teens celebrating spring break. Ok, so it’s not Shakespeare but you’ll laugh and scream as various body parts jump out of the screen at you.

3. Kick-Ass – Based on the Mark Millar comic book, this smart action comedy directed by Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake and Stardust) subverts the standard super hero movie genre and shows that actions have real consequences. Starring Nicholas Cage hilariously channelling Adam West’s Batman and featuring a breakout performance by Chloe Grace Moretz, don’t be distracted by the controversy regarding the use of a certain sensitive word, Kick-Ass is exactly what it says on the tin.

2. Toy Story 3 – The perfect farewell to some very well loved characters. Pixar continue their unbroken run of beautiful, near perfect pictures that somehow manage to reach out to the child in all of us. Released theatrically in 3D, nothing is lost in the two dimensional version now available on DVD and blu-ray. I may have shed a tear at the end but I’ll deny it if you ask me.

1.5 Scott Pilgrim vs. The World – Alright, so I can’t count. From the director of Hot Fuzz and Shaun of the Dead, Edgar Wright, comes the strangest romantic action comedy of the year. Scott Pilgrim, played by Michael Cera, who hopefully has gone to the wimpish nerd character well for the last time, must fight off the seven evil ex-lovers of the beautiful Romona (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) in order to win her heart. A flop at the cinemas, this is destined to be discovered on DVD and will soon be regarded as a classic.

1. Animal Kingdom: Wow, a home grown film as my number one. This Aussie crime drama will devastate you. With outstanding performances by Ben Mendelsohn, Guy Pearce and newcomer James Frecheville, this is Jacki Weaver’s movie. Her portrayal of the matriarch of a crime family is stunning. I know that Australia has gotten a bit of a reputation for producing depressing drug and crime dramas lately but you simply must see Animal Kingdom.

My predictions for the critics’ top five

5. Let Me In

4. The Social Network

3. Toy Story 3

2. The King’s Speech

1.5 Sex and the City 2 (just kidding)

1. Inception

Published in: on December 19, 2010 at 20:07  Leave a Comment  
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Sherlock Holmes Reborn Again

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 26th October 2010.

Sherlock, the extremely enjoyable mini-series which aired over the past two weeks, is a modern adaption of Sherlock Holmes produced by the BBC. Starring Benedict Cumberbatch (Atonement) as the Great Detective and Martin Freedman (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and The Office) as Dr John Watson, the three part series brings Arthur Conan Doyle’s characters to modern London, solving mysteries based on classic Holmes stories.

Cumberbatch’s portrayal of the eccentric genius, who solves brainbusting crime puzzles by deduction, is certainly a memorable one, but with a very long list of actors who have played Holmes, it is very hard to pick a favourite.

Not surprisingly, the character of Sherlock Holmes holds the record for the most portrayed film character with an amazing seventy five actors putting on the deerstalker cap over two hundred and eleven movies.

One of my favourite films in the eighties was Young Sherlock Holmes, produced by Steven Spielberg from a script by Christopher Columbus (Home Alone) and directed by Barry Levinson (Rain Man). The film centres of Holmes and Watson meeting as youths at boarding school. Starring Nicholas Rowe (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels) as the title character and Alan Cox (Ladies in Lavender) as Watson, the movie is a little scary for kids and features the first CGI character ever, a supernatural knight who forms from shards of a stained glass window.

Jeremy Brett (My Fair Lady) starred as Holmes from 1984 to 1994 in the British TV series The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes. With his sharp, angular features, Brett’s portrayal is widely regarded as the best of his era. Brett was fully committed to his role and compiled a seventy seven page book, The Baker Street Files, which contained every possible detail about Holmes. He carried this book around on set to check every nuance before the cameras started rolling.

Basil Rathbone starred as Sherlock in fourteen movies from 1939 to 1946, opposite Nigel Bruce as Watson. These films firmly cemented the costumed Sherlock Holmes character, with his deerstalker cap and Inverness cape, in popular culture.  Rathbone had problems with typecasting after the films ended, but eventually went on to play Holmes in radio plays and on stage.

Last year, the character of Holmes returned to the big screen with Robert Downey Jr. (Iron Man) in the title role and Jude Law (Cold Mountain) as his faithful friend. Directed by Guy Ritchie (RocknRolla), the film recreates Holmes as an action hero, with fist fights and explosions galore. It was a big box office success and will be followed up by a sequel next year.

I would have to say that my all-time favourite Sherlock Holmes is an animated one. Basil the Great Mouse Detective was a Disney animated film from 1986, and centres around a society of rats and mice living in Victorian London. Featuring the music of Henry Mancini and the voice of Vincent Price, the film is packed with classic hand drawn Disney cartoon goodness, with the title character names in honour of Basil Rathbone.

It seems that some iconic characters never die, they just get recast and readapted.

Published in: on November 9, 2010 at 07:31  Leave a Comment  
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Film Review: The Last Airbender

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 21st September 2010.

The ever expanding array of 3D movies due for release in the near future indicates that this cinematic gimmick is here to stay. The fact that 3D cinema cannot be pirated and the potential for future profits from emerging home 3D blu-ray and TV technology means that the major Hollywood studios are insisting that almost all future tent pole releases be available in 3D.

What has become clear though, is that the presence of “3D” tacked on to the end of a movie’s title is in no way a symbol of quality. And there is no better example of this than last week’s release of “The Last Airbender”, quite possibly the worst film of the year so far.

Based on the successful animated series “Avatar: The Last Airbender” which ran originally from 2005 – 2008 on US children’s cable channel Nickelodeon, the film is a mishmash of Asian mythology, martial arts and elemental manipulation. In the hands of writer and director, M. Night Shyamalan, The Last Airbender is a humourless yawnfest featuring terrible dialogue, bland performances and horrible 3D rendering.

Showing major potential with his first two features, it now appears Mr Shyamalan fluked the modern masterpieces that were The Sixth Sense (1999) and Unbreakable (2000). The shocking twist ending of the former with its famous catchphrase, “I see dead people” and the thrilling comic book plotline of the latter made M. Night a director and more importantly, a storyteller, to watch.

Unfortunately, it was all downhill from there as the director went back to the “final storyline twist” well a few too many times with Signs (2002 – I see aliens), The Village (2004 – it was all an experiment), Lady in the Water (2006 – water nymphs live in my pool filter) and The Happening (2008 – the wind did it). With his creative powers waning, The Last Airbender (Avatar has been removed from the title due to a similarly named, moderately successful film from last year) has no plot twist. Whilst the absence of a twist may well be a twist for M. Night, I would suggest that there is no plot twist because there is barely a plot.

Try bending your brain around this. There are four nations: the Fire Nation; the Water Tribes; the Air Nomads and the Earth Kingdoms. Each has members who can control or “bend” fire, water, air or earth. Only a long missing, reincarnated Dalai Lama-like being, The Avatar, can control all four elements and bring peace to the world. Sure.

To make matters worse, this storyline is leaden with clumsy dialogue clunkers such as, “Sokka, I want to believe in our beliefs just like the Firebenders believe in their beliefs.” Sorry, come again?

There has been much outrage online as nerds worldwide protest the lack of Asian actors at the forefront of this Asian mythology-based film. This wasn’t really an issue for me. Authenticity is hardly a problem when it comes to a movie featuring giant fluffy flying dogs and the yin yang spirits swimming around as large glowing koi carp.

On a positive note, the special effects of The Last Airbender are quite stunning with exciting flame and ice battles, and the casting of Slumdog Millionaire star Dev Patel a good choice.

Unfortunately, the 3D effects of the movie are simply terrible. Like Clash of the Titans, this film has been rendered into 3D post-production to cash in on the craze. With the exception of a few effective landscape scenes, the rest of the film looks remarkably 2D, with characters simply cut out and moved forward within the picture but remaining flat, much like a pop-up book.

 Unlike Clash of the Titans, which was a much better film in 2D, The Last Airbender is too flawed to improve once on DVD or 2D blu-ray. Its cliff hanger ending indicates that another 2 sequels are on their way, although this is dependent on the movie turning a profit on its US$280 million production and marketing budget.

As a member of The Golden Raspberry Foundation, I am pretty certain that The Last Airbender will get my vote for Worst Film of the Year. I’m sorry, but M. Night Shyamalamadingdong has struck out on this one. I see dumb cinema.

Published in: on September 30, 2010 at 07:27  Leave a Comment  
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Famous Characters: Recast

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 31st August 2010.

The Australian Box Office figures for the past week have Salt, starring Angelina Jolie, in the top spot, grossing a very healthy $5200000 in its first week of release. Directed by Australia’s Phillip Noyce, who knows his way around a spy thriller having previously helmed Clear and Present Danger (1994) and Patriot Games (1992), Salt features Mrs Pitt as a CIA agent who must run for her life when a KGB defector names her as a Russian sleeper assassin.

Whilst Australian cinema goers clearly appreciate Jolie’s assets, that is, her ability to jump off bridges onto moving vehicles and smash her enemies in the face with various objects, looking beautiful the whole time, something inside of me still wonders what Salt may have been like if its original star had actually agreed to make the movie.

Originally, the titular character was supposed to be a man. That’s right, Salt was written to be a vehicle for Tom Cruise. Ultimately, he jumped ship to make Knight and Day with Cameron Diaz instead. By the way, does anyone know what the title Knight and Day is supposed to mean? There’s also talk of a third Mission: Impossible sequel that may have been a little too close to Salt in terms of its spy on the run storyline for Cruise’s liking. So the producers simply rewrote Mr Salt into a Mrs Salt and a box office hit was born.

There are several iconic film characters that were originally slated to be portrayed by a different actor. No matter the reason for the recast, it must be difficult as a performer to see someone else rise to fame in “your” role.

It is hard to imagine anyone else as adventuring archaeologist and snake hater Indiana Jones. In 1981, at the time of casting Raiders of the Lost Ark, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg’s first choice for the man in the hat was Tom Selleck. Lucas wasn’t keen to work with Harrison Ford so soon following their collaborations on American Graffiti and the first two Star Wars films (or fourth and fifth if you want to be a nerd). The producers of Selleck’s hit TV series, Magnum P.I. would not release him, so Ford got the gig three weeks before shooting was to begin.

A similar situation occurred in 1986 when Pierce Brosnan was slated to replace Roger Moore as the new James Bond in The Living Daylights. Brosnan’s commitments to his TV series, Remington Steel, appeared to have concluded with its cancellation that year, so the timing seemed perfect. Unfortunately, a spike in interest in Brosnan with the announcement of the Bond offer led to NBC renewing Remington Steel for another year and the contract bound Brosnan had no choice but to decline the role. Of course, he eventually did get to play Bond a few years later, following on from Timothy Dalton in GoldenEye and three other film adventures.

Whilst on the subject of Bond, is he the same man in every film, or is “James Bond” a code name that gets passed on between different 007’s? Just thinking out aloud…

Finally, can you imagine anyone else as time travelling Marty McFly? How about Eric Stoltz? Star of Mask (1985) and Some Kind of Wonderful (1987), Stoltz filmed Back to the Future for six weeks before being recast by director Robert Zemeckis. According to Zemickis, Stoltz lacked the humorous feel that was required for the role. With short notice, Michael J. Fox, the director’s first choice for McFly but initially unavailable, was able to split his time between the film and TV sitcom Family Ties.

For the trivia buffs, Fox’s middle name is Andrew but chose “J” when he discovered that Michael Fox was already registered with the Screen Actors Guild and he disliked Andy Fox as a stage name.

For the record, a similar thing has happened to me. Way back in 1998, I auditioned for the role of Choi in The Matrix. Choi is the character who buys illegal software from Keanu Reeves’ character, Neo. This scene then leads Neo to start his awakening by “following the white rabbit.” Unfortunately, there is no great scandal or controversial recast to be found here, I just did a truly terrible audition.

Published in: on August 30, 2010 at 20:58  Leave a Comment  
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Film Props: The Ultimate Collectible

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 24th August 2010.

Are you the ultimate movie fan? Is there one film that floats your boat the most? The problem is, how do you show your true devotion? Buying the DVD or blu-ray disc is an obvious choice, but anyone can do that. You can tell the world online, but who cares what a bunch of nerds think? You might buy the poster and frame it on your wall, but between your local cinema and the video store, posters are a dime a dozen.

For the hardcore movie devotee there is a new level of fandom, owning a genuine prop from the production. Why worship a poster of that Predator when you can actually buy a genuine life size Predator costume?

Classically, film studios warehoused and archived their costumes and props to be reused. In recent times, modern manufacturing techniques combined with the sheer cost of storing and maintaining all of these items have resulted in film studios beginning to offload these props and costumes to collectors.

Fox Studios currently operate an ebay store called VIP Fan Auctions. Collectibles from such films as G.I. Joe, Up in the Air and Shutter Island have been up for auction recently. I would think that the most highly prized collectible from Shutter Island would be the script. If I owned that, I might have a chance to work out what exactly happened in that brain boggling flick. The script for G.I. Joe would also be valuable and rare, especially since I’m not entirely sure that the movie was made with one.

By the time you read this column, auctions will be closing on a bunch of items from recently axed Fox shows Ugly Betty and 24. Fancy owning Betty Suarez’ rabbit fur scarf or Jack Bauer’s long-sleeve thermal shirt? Bid now, but be warned. The latter is currently sitting at US$630.

The best source of film props and costumes I have found so far is The Prop Store. Based in London and Los Angeles, they will ship your collectible to anywhere in the world, for a price. Their website is a film geek’s paradise, but be prepared to pay top dollar. Rest assured though, they do offer an interest free payment plan. With fixed prices, there’s no chance of that annoying last second ebay gazumping.

Perhaps you’re a fan of the Batman movies? For just US$12000 you can own Val Kilmer’s cowl and chest armour, complete with those controversial nipples. Lovingly mounted on a custom build frame, you’ll be pleased to know that your bat ears have been stuffed to keep them “looking pointy and ready for business.”

Gremlins 2: The New Batch was a fun sequel which took Gizmo and pals to the Big Apple. With a price tag of US$4995, you can take home a real Gremlin, which featured in the background of the film. Constructed of foam latex, this trouble making critter has animatronic arms and moving clawed fingers.

At the more affordable end of the scale are smaller prop items which were usually mass produced for the production. A bus schedule from Speed will only set you back US$145. A chocolate bar label from Tim Burton’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a bargain at US$59. Three balloons featuring the face of Orlando Bloom (or Orloondo Bland as I like to call him, sorry Miranda) used in the film The Calcium Kid can be yours for only US$12.

So in these uncertain financial times, why risk your future on gold or stocks? The only sound investment nowadays is in Alien egg sacs and Back to the Future hoverboards.

http://www.vipfanauctions.com

http://www.propstore.com

Published in: on August 26, 2010 at 13:08  Leave a Comment  
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Paranormal Profits

This column was originally published in the Central Western Daily on Tuesday 13th April 2010.

The most profitable motion picture ever recently hit retail shelves on DVD and blu-ray. And no, I’m not writing about Avatar. Paranormal Activity, a supernatural thriller made for a paltry US$15 000, has taken more than $100 million at the US box office.

Written and directed by Oren Peli, the film was shot over a week at the director’s own home. Similar to the Blair Witch Project, which also features on the most profitable movie list, the premise of the feature is the discovery of home videos belonging to a young couple investigating strange happenings inside their apartment.

Katie and Micah (these are actually the actors’ real names too) set up a video camera in their bedroom to capture the supernatural activity that occurs while they are sleeping. As things start to go bump (and worse) in the night, the movie taps into our innate fear of what may happen when we are at our most vulnerable, that is, when we’re asleep.

 Originally screened at horror film festival, Screamfest, in 2007, Paranormal Activity attracted interest from Hollywood, particularly Steven Spielberg’s Dreamworks studio. With the intention of remaking the movie with a bigger budget and big name actors, Dreamworks agreed to one last test screening at the request of the director, who believed the original was potent enough for a general release.

The test screening was initially thought to be a failure, as patrons kept leaving the theatre, however, when the producers discovered that the reason for the departures was sheer terror, a viral marketing campaign was started. Coinciding with a very limited cinema release in US university towns, a website was set up where people could demand the US domestic release of Paranormal Activity. As word spread about this frightening flick, Paramount Pictures, which owns Dreamworks, promised to release the film when a million people requested the movie via the website.

In October 2009, as demanded, Paranormal Activity hit cinemas across the US and the rest is history.

Is it as frightening as the marketing campaign would have you believe? Put simply, no. Paranormal Activity works best in a darkened cinema with the sound up loud, or at home during the night with the lights off. The scares are pretty low-tech so don’t expect the Kraken to appear in 3D. The lead actors, who were unknowns before and likely to fade into obscurity after this film, remain believable throughout the film. The repetitive nature of the storyline which continuously returns to the bedtime surveillance camera makes the 86 minute running time seem longer.

Paranormal Activity is an effective supernatural thriller that is worth your time. I definitely recommend that you rent or buy it. This is mostly because I make an appearance in the fan featurette. At 5 minutes and 10 seconds, my spooky face can be seen. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

The top 5 most profitable movies ever:

1. Paranormal Activity

2. Tarnation

3. Mad Max

4. Super Size Me

5. The Blair Witch Project

Published in: on April 20, 2010 at 13:43  Leave a Comment  
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